(Conversation of the little girl with herself)
All of them are running around!!
Friends are running around in the playground, my parents as well as teachers are running between office, market, school and home. I wonder why everyone keeping running round and round. All of them keep pushing me to run around the play ground with those children or to climb on this merry-go-round or between school, home and playground. I do not feel like running around today!!
When I said, “No” in a weak voice they didn’t listened but when I raised my voice, they all left me alone. Within few minutes my reputation has changed completely, from being a sweet daughter to ill-behaved child, from a sincere student to an arrogant one and from a polite friend to rude one. Just because for once I followed my inner voice.
The voice inside me said, I must not run around. So I didn’t, that’s all I did. Why everyone is angry with me?
I am sad because the world does not seem to understand me, but I am also happy because I did what I really wanted to do since a long time. I have learned to say “No”. But I am also confused! Am I really turning into a bad person? Is it wrong to say “No”. I am left all alone with all these questions. Whom shall I ask? Everyone out there is angry with me. They say someone up there hear your voice even when no one else wants to listen to your side of the story. What if they are wrong, may be that someone is not up there, may be He resides somewhere down. I must first try downside before upside.
(She looked down and thought)
No, I shouldn’t!!! Grandpa always tell me that I am quite capable of handling my small problems on my own. This is not a big problem that I should bother HIM. Perhaps, I must think on my own. Dad always says, I am his big girl but when it comes to take few decisions on my own, he suddenly changes his mind and tell me that I am too young, I do not understand!! Mother at least never considers me grown up.
I need to think of some good excuse before they prohibit me from watching my favorite tv serial, may be they will not even buy a new year gift for me, what if they will leave me all alone during the holidays. Oh no!! I must quickly apologize. But wouldn’t it be fun if I will be left alone just like the kid in the movie – Home Alone. Than I will be able to do all the things which I really wanted to do and may be some robbers will come and I will defeat them. Oh yes, I could certainly do that. Than I will become favorite of my parents, teachers, friends and all my classmates will look at me in awe. Specially, that nasty big tooth girl and that red cheek boy.
Oh! Now I am tired of standing here all alone. Why Dad is not coming to pamper me, my friends are so busy they do not care about me, my teacher and mother will never come, they look quite angry. I wish grandpa was around to save me. Now what shall I do!! May be I could make an innocent face and tell mother about my stomach ache, or may be not, it’s not a good idea she will take me to the doctor right at this moment. May be I could try with the teacher by informing her that one of my friends made a nasty comment on me, or may be not, she will certainly organize a big parents-teachers meeting than the truth will come out and my friends will never ever speak to me, what if …..now I am going round and round with all these lies.
Grand pa says, if I would like to grow up and become a woman of substance. I must always speak the truth with dignity. I think now is the time to apply what he taught me, I must behave like an adult only than my elders will treat me like an adult.
(Conversation of little girl with her Dad)
Daughter – Dad!! If it is alright with you, I would like to speak with you.
Dad – Okay!! (angry and strange look).
(Girl was little scared at first but then she reminded herself about her grand pa’s words of wisdom and continued speaking)
Daughter – Sorry Dad! If I caused trouble but sometimes I feel like being alone. I do not like to do what everyone else is doing. I do not know why.
(She wanted to express her feelings properly but her limited vocabulary and expression skills tied her tongue. Dad smiled, hugged and asked her to take a walk with him towards the bench at the last corner of the playground)
Dad – My dear little girl, today you have really become my big girl. You have started hearing your inner voices and you are simply trying to hear and understand them properly. That’s the only reason why sometimes you do not feel like following everyone around. You are simply trying to spend sometime with yourself, also called Me – Time. It is essential to understand those voices properly. I am sorry too!! I couldn’t understand you before, but I am glad you spoke the truth and have chosen me to share your innermost thoughts.
Daughter –(relaxed) Dad, why these voices are speaking to me only? Why they do not speak to my friends?
Dad – My dear they speak to everyone, some people listen while some ignore. You are fortunate that you could recognize these voices and are also trying to hear them properly.
Daughter – Dad!! Who is speaking inside me?
Dad – My dear!! that’s your conscience speaking. In other words, the one up there, also resides in you and He tries to connect with you through these voices. He tries to tell you the difference between right and wrong.
Daughter – Dad, I do not understand!!
Dad – My dear, you are too young to understand this now. But the only thing what you must remember throughout your life is this that when you hear the voices inside you, follow them without any hesitation. Do not care what others will think, simply follow them they will never misguide you. Okay!!!
Daughter – Okay!!
Dad – So is my big girl ready to ride on Merry-go-round!!!
Daughter – Yes, Dad!! I am!! (proud smile)
(Father and daughter ran towards the merry-go-round with a loud laughter)
Author: Rashmi R-R
Note: This piece of writing is inspired by the picture posted (also re posted with this story) at the Weekly writing challenge 1000 words